DAS EXAM. UND TOTENHOSEN

roughly translated: a quiz. and deadpants.
thanks to sev for inspiration

if you were a tv character, who would you be and why?
mary poppins.

if you had a pin-up of any celebrity, who'd be in your room?
rachel bilson. drool.

what was your last great moment of shame?
patting a fat woman's stomach congratulating her on the pregnancy, and subsequently being slapped. i swear i thought that could only possibly happen in movies.

if you could hit staincastle for one reason, what would it be?
stop wiping off the controller with your shirt.

describe a fight as you imagine it between nads and gimp
gimp hops in the mini-van. nads is too drunk to notice as gimp runs him over, then backs over him for good measure. this, of course, doesn't kill our irish hero. gimp, overcome with remorse, throws the limp body of nads into his mini-van and drives to the hospital (forrest general, not SCRMC). during the trip, nads dies. a careful autopsy reveals the cause of death to be 30 minutes of mexican music.

a frog and a dingo are stuck in the same room with a broom, a can of coke, and a porno mag. you're a general. command your frog to victory
alright soldier. use the greasy sting someone was unable to pull out of your butt and dangle it in front of the dingo. piss him off. when he eats you tell yourself you did the best you could. as you die, don't cry. no one likes a pansy.

you walk into your kitchen at 2:30 in the morning and a minority is standing there drinking your milk. what is the appropriate recourse?
offer him your wife. this way you can blame the clamydia you gave to her on him.

a doctor tells you he thinks you need a prostate exam. how hard should you hit him?
well, that depends entirely on his race.


enjoy. i tag staincastle, gimp, and nads.